Don't "Gimme More"

You know your awards show is having major problems when you have coax major acts there by nominating them AND letting them party and drink during the show. That’s right folks. If the very celebrities nominated for the MTV's Video Music Awards don’t want to be there, why should I watch? Because the new “edgy” remake-slash-infomerical for Palms Hotel and Casino was destined from its conception to be THE trainwreck in of the year. And it opened with the blinged out caboose of Britney Spears performing in what looked like leftover of the Pussycat Dolls costumes. Mama Spears half-assed her way through a generic routine and a generic song sans the rumored theatrics of magician Criss Angel. The performance was boring. And love her or love to hate her, B-Fed has NEVER been boring. A disoriented Spears forgot to pretend to sing. She lazed and loafed through a performance as even other celebrities (her peers, no less) watched in underwhelmed horror. She looked more like Courtney Love Barbie than a girl trying to prove she still had it. It’s over, Britney. “Give Us More?” Don’t you fucking dare.

The show was not a night of unique musical collaborations and zany moments. It was a mishmash of technical difficulties, drunken riots, Kid Rock cold-cockin’ Tommy Lee, more drunken riots…but only a handful of awards were given out and only three acts actually sang on the main stage. It was probably the best thing for the actual celebrities, cutting out all that boring waiting and being sober and it got right to the parties and alcohol. For the viewer, it was nothing less than eye-garbage, lots o hype with no follow-through.MTV Producers had the genius idea to move the show from NYC to the Palms in Vegas and have celebrities (Justin Timberlake, Kayne West, Foo Fighters, etc) host their parties in the hotel’s many suites during the show. On the main stage, only several acts performed: Alicia Keys tore it up with a new single “No One” which morphed in George Michael’s “Freedom; Chris Brown once again tried to BE Michael Jackson with a very enthusiastic performance, parts of which were janked from the King of Pop himself; Justin Timberlake, BFF Timbaland and crew closed the show.

My personal highlight was a drunk Timberlake stumbling into the wall as he made his way to the main stage (he actually can mess up, even if he made it look cool), still put on one of the best performances of the night, and invite the audience up to his suite party on the 32nd floor! Apparently through the tequila-soaked blur of the night, awards were handed out, but I can’t remember for what or to whom. Justin Timberlake challenged MTV to play more videos and make less reality shows (in front of “The Hills” girls no less). I agree. I’ve even blogged about MTV’s lack of music-based programming. I think the show proved that music isn’t as bad a place as it may seem, but it’s the actual music channel that’s lost its way.

Random Note:*Sarah Silverman is not funny. MTV seems to think she’s zany and controversial, but calling anyone’s babies “mistakes” is a good way to get your ass kicked by a bodyguard. Shut up and sit down.